when B was sick in the hospital, this friend of ours sent me a txt msg asking me for our address to send us a teddy bear for B. We got rid of 99% of our stuffed animals before moving to PR, so i was a little hesitant about giving her my address for her to send me a bear. i was like, she doesnt need to send anything. B is sick and that's what was going... nothing else. she wouldn't care whether she had a bear or a blanket, or nothing.
however, i gave her my address.
why? you may ask.
well... it turns out I've had my good share of 'you shouldnt have done that' or 'that was so nice of you, but you shouldn't have'.
do you know that when i'm giving you something i'm doing it b/c i care about you and i think it's important (FOR ME) you get something from me? I try to come up with useful presents and not stupid shit, so YOU telling ME 'you shouldnt have done that' really pisses me off.
I didn't say: nah, you shouldnt send anything to B. I said; you're so sweet!!! thanks so much!
why do people feel the need to say ' you shouldn't have done that' or 'you don't need to do that'? If it's in my heart to send you $ or to give a present to your kids, be thankful. say thanks.
my friend Megan always sends stuff for my children and I made a point in not saying 'you shouldn't do this'. she loves my kids, but most importantly she loves ME and that's what matters and her presents are something we really treasure b/c I know she was thinking about us and it came out from her heart. she's not trying to impress me. she's not trying to win anything. she's doing it b/c she loves me.
same with K (our friend). she did it b/c she wanted to do something nice for B. in the end, she'd be doing it for us too.
I had decided to knit a hat for one of my friends but b/c clothing is so personal, i asked her for her fav color. She said why i was asking, so i told her i was getting a present ready for her. She said: oh no! don't worry about it. you shouldnt do anything b/c your friendship is enough for me.
Ungrateful people. i'm not expecting her to tell me thanks all her life for my present, just be happy and say: thanks for thinking of me and for taking your time to do something for me.
Fuck her. I'm not gonna make anything b/c it does seem my friendship is not that important for her when she is not gonna accept a present for me.